I'm turning 44 next week. It doesn't bother me, I don't feel any older inside! But today Steve and I took the family to Fremantle Markets to pick up some fruit and veg. We stopped off to watch the Dockers practicing at Freo Oval, the sun was shining, it was a beautiful day! Rachel wanted to get a new outfit and we called in to Valley Girl, a young and modern fashion boutique in the heart of Freo. I was looking around and picking up tops here and there to try on. I actually liked a lot of their clothes! Then I found myself infront of one of those full length mirrors and I just stood and stared. Staring back at me was a middle aged women with tatty clothes only fit for around the house, no make up and a worn out look that told a thousand stories! I must admit to being shocked at the face that stared back at me from the mirror. You see, inside I am still 17, vibrant, skinny!! but the mirror told another story. I am not going to be negative, I have spent too many years critisizing myself! but I made a decision there and then that this is the last birthday that I am going to be "fat". I have spent too many years wishing I could lose weight, planning to change before a certain time frame but still, here I am, overweight and frumpy! Next year I will be a different women. I will never allow myself to get to this weight again. If I live for another fifty years I will never reach this weight again. That is a promise to myself and I will do everything in my power to make sure it comes true.