A Modern Day Essene

I haven't shared too much about this situation but over the past 16 months I have been working through a serious addiction to the internet and internet shopping. My addiction has left us in a sad and sorry state financially. I sometimes think I have lost my husband's trust in that area. Through good counseling I realized that the root of my problem was loneliness. Over a long period of time I had withdrawn myself from the outside community and become more and more of a loner. It wasn't until we experienced a traumatic event in our family that we realized how isolated our world had become.
I have been making steps towards change. It doesn't happen overnight! I have returned to church, not the church we have belonged to for 14 years but a much smaller local church. Steve has come with me once but he is battling his own demons in relation to church and God. It is good to have people in my life again. Of course I have my darling Mum and sister but as much as I love them they are not Christians and there are some things that I can't share with them. Last Friday night a group of the ladies from church went out for a coffee. I haven't laughed as much in a long time.......it felt good.
I have cut my internet time back drastically. I still seek the support and fellowship of other homeschoolers but even that, at times, is disapointing. There is nothing like real life friendships. Sometimes things that are said can be taken the wrong way. There is nothing better than a conversation with someone in real life! words are only part of the conversation, the eyes tell a thousand stories just on their own! the hand movements, the facial expressons. All these things are hard to convey online.
My long term goal is to reach a stage where my life is so full that the internet has little place in my day. Then I will know that I have received my healing.

I apologize for sounding like an advertisement for Home School products, but I simply must give this one a plug! Art And The Bible For Children by Barry Stebbing.
I don't usually plug American sites when an item is available in Australia but this is on special at christian book in America for $14.99 (about $20 Aus) and with postage at only $10 ($15) it is still a massive saving off the original price. www.christianbook.com
Your children will be excited to start creating their own biblically-based masterpieces after looking through the artwork in Art and the Bible for Children! Favorite Bible stories are written at an elementary level for each child to understand, while art lessons and discussion questions at the end of each story provide a fun way to reinforce the lesson and basic art skills. Draw and color a nighttime sky from Genesis' creation week, Ruth in Boaz' field, and Jesus in the midst of seven golden candlesticks, as you move from Genesis through Revelation. Illustrated by homeschoolers, the glossy, full-color pages make looking through this book a treat--and serves as inspiration to get drawing! Perfect for homeschool lessons, Sunday Schools, or Christian schools. 275 pages, hardcover. Pages are reproducible for classroom use.

I enjoy art so much that I think it would be lovely to centre our education around it. The children wouldn't complain, of that I'm sure.
One of my recent finds has filled a gap quite beautifully.............Draw And Write Through History. It is available through Christian Book Store in America, a store where I have purchased a number of items over the years. www.christianbook.com
It is similar in format to the Draw Write Now series of books, but in my opinion it is much more practical. There are currently four books in the series.
My son will do anything to escape writing (narration) but is quite happy to copy an Historical picture in detail!
This book is an excellent resource if you want to brighten up your History portfolios.

IN WINTER I'M ROUNDER.

In winter I'm rounder
and fatter than before.
I'm wearing coats and sweaters
and woolen hats galore.
My hands are as plump as kittens
when I'm wearing winter mittens.
My legs in thick, snug snow pants
look like an elephant's.
Indeed, I must confess
that when I do undress,
I feel as small and light
as a bird flown out of sight.

~~By Sandra Liatsos..~~

When we first married it wasn't long before I fell pregnant with our eldest daughter. When she was one year old I got clucky but thinking that it was too soon to have another baby we bought a dog instead! I wish I could tell you that the dog was a good idea but I can't. She was a blue healer cross and she drove me crazy! She would jump up at the washing line and pull all my freshly laundered clothes down. She chewed everything! all of our shoes became victims of the Blue Healer bite. I read somewhere that having two dogs could settle a bad dog down (who wrote that.........let me at him) so believing everything that I am told we started hunting for another dog. This time we bought a small dog, a Dachshund cross! We called her Esther (after my favourite Bible Story) and she was the most placid dog we could have hoped for. Sadly she didn't have any impact on the Blue Healer! all it did was emphasize her bad behaviour. Eventually we gave the Blue Healer to someone who could provide her with a bit more land to run around on, which left us with one good dog. Esther was a real family pet. She thought she was human! we all loved her. It was a sad day when at 10 years old she became so sick that we were advised to have her put down. That was 10 years ago and we haven't owned a dog since..............
Suddenly, out of the blue, I am thinking about another dog. Steve thinks that I am being silly and it is just because I know that I can't have any more babies. I don't know, maybe that is true! But I have spent hours on the internet checking out Dog breeds. One minute I want a Golden Retriever but then I hear that they love to chew furniture............um, not a good idea. Then I want a Pug, just like the one that Don Burke had on his show, "Burkes Backyard". Then I read that they can have breathing problems. So I go through the list, poodles, Labradors, Beagles, West Highland Terriers, Old English Sheepdog.............and then I find the perfect dog for me....a Cavoodle! a King Charles Cavalier Spaniel cross Miniature Poodle. Apparently they have the beautiful nature of a King Charles without the health issues and the best bit of all.............they hardly molt because of the poodle cross. I want one, I want one, I want one. I even have a name picked out. But............and this is a big BUT...my husband says "NO". Under no circumstances is he going to buy a dog because he thinks that after five minutes my interest will wane and he will do all the walking, picking up dog muck, cleaning etc etc etc.
So what does a girl do in this situation? well, I will sulk of course................

Just lately I have been reflecting on my life. God has shown me that life is like the seasons, Spring, Summer, Autumn and Winter.
Spring was my childhood! everything was fresh, new, exciting. Life was blooming in every direction and the world lay at my feet.
Summer was My youth and beyond. A time of growth, life, newness. I saw my years of childbearing as an eternal Summer! As much as I never wanted Summer to end there came a time when My body could not cope with producing new life. My season of childbearing had ended. I had to move on...........
I didn't want to embrace the Autumn. I wanted to stay in Summer. I couldn't see my life without pregnancy, birth, young babies and toddlers. And yet at the same time I was growing tired. I didn't have the same energy levels that I had in my early twenties. I seemed to need more rest! I didn't want to look ahead and embrace a new season. What did Autumn have to offer me? But as God quietly led me along the path I started to view things in a different light. I am still surrounded by children! Although two are now married I am blessed to have seven at home. My youngest is only 17 months and it is exciting to watch him grow. He will always be my baby. Every stage is exciting in the knowledge that this is the last baby. I love watching my children grow older, becoming confident in who they are. I love to see them growing in their own faith walk. I love my married daughters and their husbands. I am so blessed. I look forward to the Autumn season because it is a time for me and my husband. A time where we get to reap the harvest. Often we sowed in tears but the Bible tells us that we will reap in joy. There are so many things that I have not been able to do in the other seasons of life. My hobbies and interest were often put aside for more urgent needs. I look forward to spending more time painting, scrapbooking and even sewing! I look forward to having some holidays without crying, whinging babies in the back seat of the car who hate any journey longer than thirty minutes! A life without nappies! I can't even imagine that as I have been buying nappies constantly for 23 years! I look forward to concentrating on my health and appearance, a luxury for a new mum! I have let my body go, let health issues go unchecked
My Autumn time! The leaves still cling to the branches and are afire with color. We are strong, fearless and finally able to say and do what we feel is right rather than worrying about what others might think. It's a good time to be alive.